Jusenkyo 2003 Christmas Catalog!
by origreatguy
Summary: This is just a quickie that I thought of while bored. I will continue to update with more items, but as of now have been hit with severe writer's block. Please review with ideas if you want updates! Thanks!


Jusenkyo 2003 Christmas Catalog!!  
  
By origreatguy  
  
I don't own Ranma 1 / 2. Also, a lot of the stuff is made up (for example, a few varieties of Jusenkyo water that are completely from my imagination).  
  
Have you searched every other catalog you could find, but are still stuck on what to get your cursed loved one? Or are you cursed yourself, and are trying to make the best of it? If so, this catalog is for you! We at Jusenkyo Enterprises only want what is good for you, and as such, we have extended our item list from last year's! Thanks in advance for buying from us!  
  
Also, be sure to check our website at www.jusenkyo.fake!  
  
Disclaimer: Jusenkyo Enterprises cannot be held responsible for any actions or events that may occur because of your purchase. ----------------------------------- Page Three Sweepstakes  
  
What could be better than spending Christmas together with your loved one, at a four-star hotel just overlooking Jusenkyo itself? Now, you can have the chance to win an all-expenses-paid trip to Jusenkyo! All it takes is one purchase from this catalog, and you are instantly registered to win! Go ahead, give it a chance! The winner could be you!  
  
If you are not interested in registering for the sweepstakes, please mention this specifically on your order form.  
  
----------------------------------- Page Four Water  
  
Whatever the purpose, water is the most important object in the world. Only thing is, our water is specially geared towards the cursed!  
  
Are you cursed and need to return to your original state? Or do you need to curse someone else? If so, you're in the right place! All of our water is 100% guaranteed to have an instant effect. If by any chance you have been given the wrong water, we will completely refund your purchase and send whatever is needed to negate the effects, free of charge!  
  
Jusenkyo Water --- 550 yen (mostly for s/h)  
  
Comes in the following varieties: Man, Girl (comes in Regular and Tomboy), Young Man, Duck, Black Piglet, Yeti Riding a Bull Carrying a Crane and Eel, Pious Man, Twins, Octopus (don't ask how the octopus got drowned!) Ashura, Monkey, Hamster, Idiot, Rabbit, Dog, Pigeon, and Egomaniac.  
  
***  
  
If for any reason you have to freeze someone (or something) in its cursed state, we can also provide water drawn from the Pail of Preservation. We wish to remind you, though, that you are responsible for your actions. It's all your fault if you end up causing someone severe emotional trauma by freezing them in this way! Other than that, feel free to buy this if you really need it!  
  
Pail of Preservation Water --- 800 yen  
  
***  
  
On the opposite end of the spectrum, hot water from the Water Pot of Liberation can free any person frozen in their curse by the Pail of Preservation. Just heat and apply!  
  
Water Pot of Liberation Water --- 800 yen ----------------------------------- Page Five Protection Agents  
  
Are you okay with being cursed, but just need to stay in one form for a while without worrying about changing back? These items are guaranteed to do just that! Feel free to like at our wide selection!  
  
Any time you're taking a bath, you can always use our special Waterproof Soap! Just apply liberally, and any water that touches you will slip right off, and not have any effect! Each usage lasts up to a day.  
  
Waterproof Soap --- 375 yen  
  
***  
  
The next time you go out in the rain, don't leave without one of our specialized Water-Heating Ponchos! Each one has a built-in device that automatically heats any water within a set radius! Just turn it on and you can go singing in the rain again without worrying about your curse!  
  
Each poncho comes with non-replaceable battery. Battery life can be seen from inside the hood.  
  
Water-Heating Ponchos --- set of five for 1,100 yen  
  
***  
  
For a fool-proof yet short-term solution, try the Mystic Water! This is normal water that comes in a specially treated jar. Just dunk it on your body, and all outside water is repelled from your skin! Lasts for two hours.  
  
Mystic Water --- one usage for 300 yen ----------------------------------- Page Six Prototypes  
  
Do you like to go on the wild side? Are you the kind of person who's willing to take the risks and try out radical new developments? If you answered yes, this section is just for you!  
  
Warning: These products have not been thoroughly tested. Jusenkyo Enterprises cannot be held responsible in case of injury or death involved in the use of these products.  
  
***  
  
The Reverse-a-Curse dramatically lessens the likelihood of you being changed into your cursed form, by reversing the effects of the curse! This item works by making you change into your cursed form with hot water, and your regular form with cold water (which there is always an abundance of). Ideal for those who are OK with their curse, but wish they didn't change so frequently!  
  
Note: This product functions by changing your "regular" form to what was once your "cursed" form. As such, applying Jusenkyo water that would normally break your curse will fail to have an effect. Also, if you are hit with the same Jusenkyo water that caused your curse, you will lose your "regular" form and it may be impossible to retrieve it. In any case, one could use the Reverse-a-Curse after their first usage to revert to their past state.  
  
Reverse-a-Curse --- one unit for 5000 yen  
  
***  
  
At the time of publication, we were unable to add any more prototypes to our Christmas catalog. Please check our website for more products! -----------------------------------  
  
Ranma, Genma, Shampoo, Ryoga and Mousse all look up from reading their separate catalogs; a devilish look shown on their faces.  
  
"Interesting...." 


End file.
